FRIDAY FICTIONEERS …..January 29, 2016
The challenge is 100 WORDS OR LESS.
THE GETAWAY
Alena heard a tap on the window. It was Quinn!
She quickly packed a few things, threw them in a pillowcase and climbed down the ladder propped against the house.
They quickly made their way through the gate and ran to his car.
She turned twenty-one that day and finally escaped from her parents.
Quinn and her boarded a cruise ship, married on board, and settled in Costa Rica.
The news reported her parents arrest for killing a young woman twenty-one years earlier and stealing her baby girl.
Words (88)
Copyright © 2016 Written by Jessie Cross ~ All rights reserved
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Way to hit with twist at the end. It’s unbelievable her parents were murderers and baby stealers. Thank goodness her life will be better with Quinn. Great writing Jessie.
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Thank you, Mandi. She’s very lucky to have gotten away.
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I didn’t see the twist at the end coming, very well done
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Thank you, I appreciate that.
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Thank you mandi! I’m glad it turned out well. It was one of those that was quite long and I had to keep chopping and chopping and hope I had something meaningful by the time I got it down to size!
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That’s so horrible it could be true! Well done.
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Yes, and I would not be surprised about it. Thank you for reading and commenting.
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That’s a whole lifetime in 100 words. Good story.
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Thank you!😊
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Quite a twist at the end! What wicked people, I’m glad she escaped.
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Me too! Even some bad things come to an end sooner or later. And, wicked people get punished. Thank you. 😊
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Dear Jessie,
That would be a great reason to leave. I didn’t see the twist coming. Nicely done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you, Rochelle. I’m glad you like it.
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Powerful finale there, JC!
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Thank you! 😊
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I also did not see the twist coming! Nicely done!
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Thank you! 😉”
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Did not see the twist coming at all! Wow! Thank goodness for Quinn!
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Yes, her true love lifesaver after 21 years. Thank you for reading and commenting.
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And here you lured me into believing that Quinn was a mischievous lass eloping her caring parents… Terrible couple really.
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Yes, terrible. They deserve each other and deserve to be punished. Thanks for reading and commenting.
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Pow! What a story! Excellent, taut, well-paced narrative, with that great twist at the end.
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Thanks so much! I’m glad you enjoyed it. 😊
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I agree with the other, that was a great twist at the end! Quite the surprise! Great story!
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Thank you, I’m so glad it was a surprise and you enjoyed it! I appreciate the compliment. 😍
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I did enjoy it! 🙂
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Nicely done with a twist I didn’t see coming.
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Thank you, I’m pleased that you enjoyed it.😃
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Woah! The seemingly simple tale catches the reader off guard with the climax! Commendable story telling in such a tight restriction on number of words!
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Thank you for the compliment. Restricted wording forced me to really work at getting the main idea across. 😃
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THAT ENDING tho! I want more……Please can you turn this into an extended story, love the twist at the end.
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Thank you! I may be able to tie it in with another challenge.😃
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i wonder if somehow she discovered the truth and whether she told on them leading to their arrests. well done.
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That’s possible, after all, she was sort of like a prisoner in her own home, and 21 years is a long time. Thank you for reading and commenting. 🙂
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Good story. I liked the twist at the end. Imagine what she lived with if she found out. 🙂
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Thank you! 🙂 Yes, finding that out would be awful.
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Always unexpected twist at the end of a great story. Love it! 🙂
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Thank you! 🙂
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I used Getaway in my title as well before I read your post. This gives you a surprise at the end. At first it is just a young girl eloping but then we find out there is a lot more to the story!
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Yes, life seems easy to figure out ,but it can be more complex than we realize. Thank you for reading commenting. 😃
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This is a very good story 🙂 keeps you interested, and thinking.
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Thanks so much! 😊
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Impressive twist! Really grabbed me. Good thing she got away before the same fate befell her!
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That’s true! Thank you. 🙂
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I am so happy she escaped their terrible house.
Didn’t see the twist coming at all.
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Thank you, glad it was surprise for you. 😃
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This is great. I think if she finds out, she’ll actually be relieved to find that these horrible people weren’t her parents. Deserved or not, running away would have left her with a bit of guilt deep down, which here isn’t necessary, just relief.
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Thank you! She was probably very relieved to realize that she has none of their genes!
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What I want now is a sequel – Alena reuniting with the relatives of her unfortunate mother – her real family. Also, who knows what happened to her father. Nicely done, Jessie!
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There are all kinds of possibilities on this one thank you for your encouraging comments! 😊
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