FRIDAY FICTIONEERS …..January 29, 2016
The challenge is 100 WORDS OR LESS.
THE GETAWAY
Alena heard a tap on the window. It was Quinn!
She quickly packed a few things, threw them in a pillowcase and climbed down the ladder propped against the house.
They quickly made their way through the gate and ran to his car.
She turned twenty-one that day and finally escaped from her parents.
Quinn and her boarded a cruise ship, married on board, and settled in Costa Rica.
The news reported her parents arrest for killing a young woman twenty-one years earlier and stealing her baby girl.
Words (88)
Copyright © 2016 Written by Jessie Cross ~ All rights reserved
Way to hit with twist at the end. It’s unbelievable her parents were murderers and baby stealers. Thank goodness her life will be better with Quinn. Great writing Jessie.
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Thank you, Mandi. She’s very lucky to have gotten away.
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I didn’t see the twist at the end coming, very well done
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Thank you, I appreciate that.
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Thank you mandi! I’m glad it turned out well. It was one of those that was quite long and I had to keep chopping and chopping and hope I had something meaningful by the time I got it down to size!
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That’s so horrible it could be true! Well done.
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Yes, and I would not be surprised about it. Thank you for reading and commenting.
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That’s a whole lifetime in 100 words. Good story.
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Thank you!😊
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Quite a twist at the end! What wicked people, I’m glad she escaped.
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Me too! Even some bad things come to an end sooner or later. And, wicked people get punished. Thank you. 😊
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Dear Jessie,
That would be a great reason to leave. I didn’t see the twist coming. Nicely done.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Thank you, Rochelle. I’m glad you like it.
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Powerful finale there, JC!
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Thank you! 😊
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I also did not see the twist coming! Nicely done!
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Thank you! 😉”
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Did not see the twist coming at all! Wow! Thank goodness for Quinn!
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Yes, her true love lifesaver after 21 years. Thank you for reading and commenting.
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And here you lured me into believing that Quinn was a mischievous lass eloping her caring parents… Terrible couple really.
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Yes, terrible. They deserve each other and deserve to be punished. Thanks for reading and commenting.
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Pow! What a story! Excellent, taut, well-paced narrative, with that great twist at the end.
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Thanks so much! I’m glad you enjoyed it. 😊
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I agree with the other, that was a great twist at the end! Quite the surprise! Great story!
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Thank you, I’m so glad it was a surprise and you enjoyed it! I appreciate the compliment. 😍
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I did enjoy it! 🙂
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Nicely done with a twist I didn’t see coming.
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Thank you, I’m pleased that you enjoyed it.😃
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Woah! The seemingly simple tale catches the reader off guard with the climax! Commendable story telling in such a tight restriction on number of words!
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Thank you for the compliment. Restricted wording forced me to really work at getting the main idea across. 😃
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THAT ENDING tho! I want more……Please can you turn this into an extended story, love the twist at the end.
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Thank you! I may be able to tie it in with another challenge.😃
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i wonder if somehow she discovered the truth and whether she told on them leading to their arrests. well done.
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That’s possible, after all, she was sort of like a prisoner in her own home, and 21 years is a long time. Thank you for reading and commenting. 🙂
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Good story. I liked the twist at the end. Imagine what she lived with if she found out. 🙂
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Thank you! 🙂 Yes, finding that out would be awful.
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Always unexpected twist at the end of a great story. Love it! 🙂
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Thank you! 🙂
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I used Getaway in my title as well before I read your post. This gives you a surprise at the end. At first it is just a young girl eloping but then we find out there is a lot more to the story!
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Yes, life seems easy to figure out ,but it can be more complex than we realize. Thank you for reading commenting. 😃
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This is a very good story 🙂 keeps you interested, and thinking.
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Thanks so much! 😊
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Impressive twist! Really grabbed me. Good thing she got away before the same fate befell her!
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That’s true! Thank you. 🙂
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I am so happy she escaped their terrible house.
Didn’t see the twist coming at all.
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Thank you, glad it was surprise for you. 😃
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This is great. I think if she finds out, she’ll actually be relieved to find that these horrible people weren’t her parents. Deserved or not, running away would have left her with a bit of guilt deep down, which here isn’t necessary, just relief.
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Thank you! She was probably very relieved to realize that she has none of their genes!
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What I want now is a sequel – Alena reuniting with the relatives of her unfortunate mother – her real family. Also, who knows what happened to her father. Nicely done, Jessie!
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There are all kinds of possibilities on this one thank you for your encouraging comments! 😊
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